At the age of 27 I had a mental breakdown. Lost my mind and my way completely…..
That was 6 months ago. Now 28, struggling to come to terms with where I’ve ended up, I’m striving for a touch of ‘normality’. What ‘normal’ is? I’m not quite sure.
Food was a huge part of my life, whether that be cooking for others, creating and writing recipes, or just eating out. I find myself at a crossroads……..well a dead end really. The prospect of seeing other people scares the bejesus out of me, let alone cooking for anyone. I honestly cannot see myself cooking and creating like I once did. That part of me has been tarnished, overshadowed by various happenings and memories.
My new story starts here, written words, my mind on paper. Food is still something that intrigues me, for different reasons than before. Still struggling with mental health issues, severe anxiety and an occasional drop into what I call a ‘breakdown phase’. A recurring feeling of confusion, despair and not knowing how to shut my head up! I find the relationship between the food we eat and mental health fascinating. The sheer vastness of choice we all have, most of us not knowing that a certain choice could result in smiles or frowns, elation or sadness. Granted, society today knows all about the foods that make you fat, or give you energy. Even studies on what foods can contribute to migraines or what foods to avoid when pregnant. But what food puts a smile on your face? Or can an environment in which you eat effect your mood? Maybe satisfying a naughty craving now and then can improve a persons mental stability, whilst also teaching will power to only indulge in moderation. Can ignoring a craving over and over have a detrimental effect on a persons day or even the way they treat others?
This is what I intend to figure out. Or at least try to. I’ll take you along with me on a journey to find the happy smiley food, places and habits, to help you as well as myself, to have a happy mind and a full tum.
This was written 2 years ago, only recently have I found the confidence to put it out there…..let’s move forward, smile, it’s the only way xx